Why I Gave Up Facebook (temporarily) and Why Maybe You Should Too. (Or How to survive the coming election and still be a Christian)

Things have been getting uncomfortable around the Jacoby household for a while now and it has nothing to do with the fact of a teenager in my house.  No, the problem was my clothes, or more specifically my expanding waist line.  Unfortunately, I had become a little overwhelmed at work and over the course of the last year or so, I’d put on a too much weight.  When I noticed that my local gym was having a contest to see who could lose the most weight in 60 days I decided that would be the perfect incentive to get me back on track – a goal to strive for.  So I started planning my new healthily eating and exercise habits which included some reading as well.  One of the articles I read was about the connection between our sleep patterns and overall health which got me to thinking… I haven’t been sleeping all that well lately.  And part of my problem was Facebook.

                                                  

Facebook specifically, and social media in general, can be a tremendous blessing.  It can be a fast way to get news and keep in touch with people both near and far.  But it can also suck more and more of our time each day.  It was also proving another challenge to me, as a pastor.  While for the majority of time it gave me helpful and interesting insight in the lives of the members of Summit of Peace, it was also becoming a way for me to “see” sin but not have an adequate way to respond.

Now I’ll be the first to admit that I’m far from perfect, especially when it comes to social media.  My “spiritual gift” of sarcasm can often get me into trouble and even hurt people’s feelings (which I am always sorry for).  But over the past few months it seemed more and more of us were using social media to express “heat and not light.”  What I mean is that the strong feelings we have on ________ (fill in the blank) was leading to Facebook posts that I fear were breaking some of the commandments or at the very least forgetting Jesus’ words to us “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” (John 14:27) 

So in the hopes of providing some “light instead of heat” here are some of my own personal reflections on “Signs it might be time for a Facebook break – or personal reflection.”  And in good Lutheran fashion I thought I’d approach them from our understanding of the 10 Commandments with Luther’s explanation.

#1.  “You shall have no other gods.”  What does this mean?  “We should fear, love and trust in God above all things.”

Fear, love and trust in God above all things… All of us love to use Facebook to express our views on things that are important to us and there is nothing wrong with that.  My fear is that we have allowed our strong feelings to give the impression to the “Facebook world” that the most important thing in the world is this particular issue.  I see this most often as it relates to the upcoming election, but it also applies to our feelings about other political and social subjects.  We write so strongly about them that we may be giving the world the impression that our “fear, love and trust” is in these particular issues going my way.  All of them are certainly important, but none are more important than our Lord and the relationship we have with him.  Next time we are going to post on an important political, social or moral issue to us - perhaps before we press “post” - reread your post and ask “Does this post express my views on this topic AS WELL AS show that I do not place the importance of this issue above God’s love for me, my love for him or my neighbor?”  Another question we should ask ourselves is about the number of posts we share on any given topic.  For example, if you “share” 1000 posts on who you think should be our next president but never share a post on how you believe that our God remains in control no matter who is president… guess which message people are more likely to receive.

#4.  “Honor your father and mother.”  What does this mean?  “We should fear and love God so that we do not despise or anger our parents and other authorities, but honor them, serve and obey them, love and cherish them.”

Every time we cover this topic in my 8^th grade confirmation class, I spend as much time on the “our parents” portion of this lesson as I do on the “other authorities.”  Lutherans have always believed that the 4^th commandment also showed us how we were to treat all of the authorities that God has placed over us, both elected and appointed.  Doesn’t matter if we voted for them, doesn’t matter if we like them, doesn’t matter if we agree with them.  So before we press “post”, perhaps we should ask “Does this post express my views of this particular public servant while at the same time showing honor, obedience and love to them as commanded by God?”  If we can’t do that then we’d probably be better off deleting it.

#8.  “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.”  What does this mean?  “We should fear and love God so that we do not tell lies about our neighbor, betray him, slander him, or hurt his reputation, but defend him, speak well of him, and explain everything in the kindest way.”

Wow, this one could be its own entire article.  But for the sake of brevity let’s just focus on “but defend him, speak well of him, and explain everything in the kindest way.”  In the 8^th commandment, God seeks to help protect our reputation and this only happens when we communicate with charity about one another AND this includes people in the public world.  I fear we all struggle with this in a couple of ways on Facebook.  First, when we see a post or article that is “against” someone that we don’t like we have a tendency to “share” it right away.  Problem is that there are untrue stories about people on the internet all the time.  So if we share something without bothering to check if it is true, we break the 8^th commandment.  Don’t have the time or resources to check it?  Don’t share it.

Second, and this is the most difficult of all in my opinion:  even if the post is true AND we share it in order to “hurt” another person, we have broken the 8^th commandment.  Is this a surprise?  It usually is to my 8^th graders as well.  The 8^th commandment speaks against slander (sharing false information that is intended to harm another person) and against gossip (which may be true information BUT is being shared with the purpose of hurting another person) as well.  Obviously this one is very difficult.  Today’s politicians certainly have feet of clay and we may feel VERY strongly about certain individuals.  But still we should ask… “Am I sharing this post with the intent of hurting someone’s reputation?  Am I explaining things in the kindest way?  Am I putting the best construction on people’s words or actions?”  If the answer is no, then we probably shouldn’t post.

The truth is that I am often not able to follow the above advice myself.  So that led me to make the rather sudden decision (when I started my new healthy living lifestyle) to also give up Facebook - at least for a little while.  As of the writing of this article I’ve been off of Facebook for 5 weeks and I must say I don’t miss it near as much as I thought.  I do miss the connections with a lot of people and to be honest I don’t have anything funny to say anymore or any funny memes to share… apparently I have no original material!  But one day I’ll go back on Facebook, probably after the election, and hopefully with a healthier approach.  But in the meantime, I’d recommend these words to all of us at SOP…

“Let your light shine before others,

so that they may see your good works and

 give glory to your Father who is in heaven.”

(Matthew 5:16)

And when we fail to do that both in life and on Facebook…“Jesus said ‘Your sins are forgiven.’”

In Christ,

Pastor Jacoby

P.S.  Also, on a related topic… I would humbly suggest as your pastor that you NEVER EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER share those posts that contain something like “if you really love God then share this…”  There are so many things wrong with them I don’t even know where to start.  First, they are a confusion of Law and Gospel and we Lutherans are supposed to be experts on Law and Gospel.  Telling someone about God’s love is Gospel but doing it in a way that makes them feel “guilty” if they don’t is Law and so ruins the whole point.  Second, our Lord’s message to the Pharisees throughout the entire Gospels is “stop just saying you love God, act like.  And a great way to act like it is to love your neighbor.”  So my suggestion would be the next time you are tempted to “share” one of those posts, get off your computer and go shovel your neighbor’s driveway, rake the leaves in her yard or go volunteer at a soup kitchen.  I guarantee that Jesus will “like” that more than your post.

Pants

Sometimes Jesus doesn’t have a beard…

and sometimes he needs to pull up his pants.

The first thing that I noticed about Jesus was that he didn’t have a beard.  The next thing I noticed was that he needed to pull up his pants.  Finally, I noticed that he was just a teenager.

I was celebrating thanksgiving in Cambodia with a wonderful pork and rice dish.  To be totally accurate, it was Thanksgiving in the USA but I was 8,000 miles away in Siem Reap, Cambodia volunteering on a Habitat for Humanity project.  Jim Witt and I had traveled there with some other Lutherans from the Denver metro area on a short-term mission trip.  For the previous few days we had been leading a Youth Conference for the Christian youth of Cambodia on the Means of Grace.  It was a wonderful opportunity to share with them the way in which our Lord promises to work in this world.  It was also a wonderful way for me to learn that in many ways teenagers are the same the world over.  The girls often gathered together in the corner casting shy glances at the boys who were strutting around trying to show off.  There were also a number of boys that needed to pull up their pants.

Toward the end of the Youth Conference all the youth went out into the community to do some service projects.  I happened to be assigned to a Habitat for Humanity project with 10 of the youth including, you guessed it, a teenage boy who needed to pull up his pants.  We traveled out to a rural area where we met a family of five living in a shack with a dirt floor.  Our job was to build them a latrine.  Habitat had delivered the materials and provided the plans, but our team needed a leader.  And who do you suppose volunteered?  You guessed it, low pants boy, my group clown. 

To my mind we were off to a poor start.

It turned out I was wrong.  As I came to discover, my low pants teen actually knew what he was doing.  It just so happened that this teenage boy had a steady construction job whenever he wasn’t in school, which meant every afternoon after school and during any breaks.  And let me tell you, he was a brick laying machine!  He got the other boys organized framing the latrine, digging the hole, mixing concrete and hauling water - and before you knew it that rural family had a brand new latrine to use.  As I spoke to my professional brick layer about his construction experience and his family something suddenly registered with me.  This young teen that was helping build a latrine for a family “in need” did not have a latrine at his own home.  He was literally giving to someone out of his need, sharing his gifts and skills with those in need.  And that’s when it hit me. 

I had just seen Jesus at work in Cambodia. 

But Jesus wasn’t done in rural Siem Reap.  Following our Thanksgiving feast of pork and rice, I went to round up my youth to get back to work.  I couldn’t find any of the girls.  After a few minutes of looking I found them inside the family’s home.  Most of them were sitting on the dirt floor finishing their lunch…with the exception of one.  She was sitting on the bed, wearing her “Hello Kitty” T-shirt, next to the grandmother in the family.  The grandmother was quite old and blind and had been resting in bed all morning as we worked.  But upon finding her in the home, this teenage girl had sat down next to her and begun to read her the Bible. 

Jesus was at it again.

When our Lord’s call leads Christians into their neighborhoods, communities and even across the world we can sometimes mistakenly believe that Jesus isn’t present until “we” show up.  But Jesus paints a different picture in John 20:21 when he tells the disciples, “As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.”  And this is not a “divide and conquer” kind of thing, as if Jesus is sent to one place and we are sent to another.  No, we are sent where Jesus has already gone.  We are not delivering Jesus as much as we are joining Jesus in what he is already doing.   

And while it took me flying 8000 miles to remember this lesson, I pray you’ll learn from my shortsightedness. 

Wherever it is that the Lord has led you… he is already there.

He is there and he is at work.

He is caring for the people he loves.

He is serving them.

He is bringing them his message of peace, love and restoration.

Keep your eyes open.  Jesus might be the homeless man on the street on your way to work, he might be the soccer mom in your neighborhood, he might be sitting next to you in school.  He might be reading a Bible while wearing a “Hello Kitty” T-shirt.  He might even be the kid that needs to pull up his pants giving to others out of his need.

Rest

Not too long ago someone asked me which of the 10 Commandments I thought Christians ignored the most.  It brought me up short, because as I mentally went through each one I briefly thought, “Yeah, it’s that one.”  In fact, I had such a hard time answering it that we created a “poll” question on our church Facebook page to see what everyone else thought.

If you have ever had the chance to listen to me teach on the 10 Commandments, you know that one of the points I make is:  “If you ‘break’ any of Commandments 2-10 then you have also broken Commandment #1.  That’s because in the course of breaking one of the others you have also failed to ‘fear, love and trust in God above all things.’

But instead of taking the easy road and saying #1, the commandment that kept rolling around in my head the most was #3:  “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy.” 

·      Today, the average American church-goer considers “regular” church attendance to mean around twice a month (whereas previous generations considered it to be 4 times a month).

·      Even more interesting is the research which reports that while 40% of Americans claim to be in church on any given Sunday the number is actually closer to 20% as reported by their churches. 

·      Looking closer to home we have recently completed our statistical report for the LCMS and for 2014 reported that we had 684 baptized members and an average worship attendance of 270 per Sunday.  If you do the math you’ll see that means that each Sunday at SOP 39% of our members are in attendance.  And while this percentage is slightly better than the average for mainline churches in America (30%), it is certainly nothing to brag about.

I’d guess that if we applied this attendance rate to any other area of our life we would think it was pretty pathetic.  Imagine if:

·      Your child was in attendance at only 39% of their school days (would they miss something important in their lessons?)

·      Your child attended only 39% of their activity practices and games (would they be the best they could be?)

·      You attended meetings for work only 39% of the time (would you get promoted at work?)

·      Your doctor canceled 61% of his appointments with you (might you miss an important diagnosis?)

·      Your spouse or loved ones showed up to 39% of your date nights and holidays (what are the odds on that relationship working?)

But the problem is two-fold.  God’s original intent for the Sabbath day included a day to gather together in community and receive His gifts of forgiveness, love, peace and healing.  But the other half of it was rest.  He wanted us to rest.

It is no exaggeration for me to say that at least once a week I have someone share with me the stresses they are experiencing, almost always because they feel pulled in too many directions.  They are on the go 24/7 and unsure how to change.  Sometimes I’m feeling kind of bold and I’ll ask them if I can look at their calendar.  Without exception, when I look at their calendar, they have never blocked off time for “worship or rest.”

The truth of the matter is that I believe that worship and rest go together.  That we are able so get the most out of our Sabbath “rest” when it begins with receiving God’s gifts to us.  The reminder that we are his in baptism, the assurance that our sins our forgiven, the power to live a new life given in his body and blood.  I believe we NEED these things and that we cannot have true rest without them.

But I’m also a realist and know that people will miss church once in a while.  But if you want to know a secret, I always prefer to have people say to me “Sorry, I missed worship last week pastor. The family and I needed to rest.”  It’s much preferable to a list of all the things going on in their life that has taken priority over their Sabbath rest.

In the Gospel of Matthew we find some of my favorite words from Jesus “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (Matthew 11:28-29)  I love these words because they remind me that both my needs for worship and rest are met in the person of Jesus.

The peace that quiets the frantic voices in my head can only come from Jesus.

The healing that removes all of my failures can only come from Jesus.

The rest for my bone-weary soul comes only from Jesus.

So my advice to you?  Get some rest!  Pastor’s orders.